Wife's Days Off: Part 1

My wife took a couple of days off this week.
We (she) decided we would do stuff as a family.
This is actually a great idea. We don't do much together outside the house.

We planned a few outings.
Day 1: Topeka Zoo

Please keep in mind that the Topeka Zoo is about an hour from the KC Metro area.
1. Pick a driver.
2. Get something for the passenger to do.
3. Get something for the kids to do. (We forgot. This might be a #1 to most.)
4. Bring a camera. (We have these nifty phones right? Yup, we forgot.)
5. The sign for the zoo is very small. (Yup, we missed it. Had to hang a U.)

The Topeka Zoo is a very nice place. We got in for half off with our FOTZ Memberships.
You walk in and BAM! Animals right there in your face.
Not just an otter either. A Giraffe!

Note: Follow the toddler. He can be loud. This zoo is pretty small.
With quite a lot packed into it. We toured the whole thing in about 2 hours.

We walked around to the rain forest bulding. Kids wanted to go in.
Walked around in there for awhile. Got the closest I have been to a flamingo, Camen Croc, Armadillo ( buried himself), and a large fruit bat. (About a foot tall.)

Saw lions, tigers and bears. Oh, My!

The best part of the zoo was leaving.
Don't get me wrong. I really liked the zoo.
But there is an awsome mini train across the street.
It is a train for kids and adults alike. It has been running for 43 years.
Tokens to ride are $1 each. Doesn't matter how old you are. If you ride, you pay.
Train ride takes about 15-20 min. Even goes in a tunnel and over a tressel. (Bridge)
Then comes back into the station.
The kids got to walk up front and sound the whistle.
My wife politely declined.

There is a fun looking pool in the area. We don't know if it is public or not.
We heard their PA system say something about a contamination.
(Don't forget your swim diapers)

There are two playgrounds if your kids still have energy.
Swings, slides, a wicked cresent teeter-totter.
(Almost sent my wife end over ass.)
And some play trains to climb on.
The other one has a lot of sculptures you can climb on and play around.
Gorillas, a whale, a boat, etc....

We ate at a nearby Wendy's. Then headed home.
Little monkey was asleep after 5 min on the road.
Didn't even make it out of Topeka.
And, the tolls on I-70 are prety cheap. $2.15 one way.
A great day trip.

On the way back we stopped at Legends.
Walked around and window shopped.
Got a treat from Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory.
Kids then played around the fountain display.

Load them up. Time to go. Home.

More tomorrow.

The Teenager Comes Out!!!

So, I'm driving home from my mom's on the 4th of July.
I call a buddy who had to work.
"How was tonight? Slow?"
B: "Yeah. Watched fireworks from the roof."
"Cool."
B: "It's ok. Hey. Are you up for some Call of Duty 4?"
"I'm on the road. Should be home in about 40."
B: "Great. I'll be out of here in an hour. Get on and we'll play. Boss is playing too."

Now I know I shouldn't. I have to work a double in the morning.

"Ummm... Ok, sounds good."

Finished driving home.
Turned on XBOX 360.
Wait.... Wait.... Wait....
Got on FB to do stupid, time sucking games.
Wait..... Wait..... Wait.....
Watch part of movie I had on DVR.

Get text. "Be on soon"

Wait..... Wait.... Wait......

About to give up when I see they have gotten on.
It seems that my buddy has gotten hold of some beer before he left.
He is drunk.
Now, my buddy likes to joke and harass people when he is sober.
It just gets worse.

Play for awhile. Get fed up with the harassment. Turn off XBOX.
Watch a little more tv.
Look outside.
The sun is up.
I should go to sleep.
.....
......
........
.........
Sun is up. No point in going to sleep now.
Stopped by gas station to get two 5 hour energy shots.
Worked the whole day.
Had to stay late and clean because the inspector was going to be there in the morning.
Had to get up with the kids.
..zzz
..zzzzzzz

I am a stupid man.

Kid again. For a night.

I am a kid again. Not a care in the world.
It's Saturday night and I get to light fireworks!
Not the little crappy ones you get when you are a kid.
I'm talking about the ones that come with five different safety warnings, a hazmat suit, and a written disclaimer to sign, saying that if you are dumb enough to hold this when it goes off.....
Well, let's just say you won't be writing any letters to the company.
I bought a butane lighter just for tonight.
Blue fire, very hot.... won't light. Cheap piece of shit.
Get out the candle lighter.
Drop mortar into tube. (yes I said mortar)
Light the fuse.
Walk 5 steps.
Cover ears.
(Whoomp)
Look up while blinking cause I looked when it took off.
(Ooohh, AAhhhh)
Repeat 5 times.

Can't see the family due to the barn in-between us.
After walking back to the house with singed fingers, missing part of beard, and blind from powder flash.
Find that half have gone inside.
The other half thought it would be rude to have me walk back and find I had been deserted.

Now I have to drive home so I can sleep and work a double the next day while wife and kids get to enjoy MY mom's pool. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.

Next year, I'm buying snappers.

Or gunpowder.